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Decisions – The Box

As stated in Decisions Part One, making decisions can be one of the hardest things humans do. They fret, they worry, and they make themselves unhappy all during the process and even afterward by second-guessing their decision.

In Part One, we discussed how to approach repetitive decisions and ‘everything else’. Now let’s tackle the hard one, Big Decisions.

I call my method of making these decisions ‘the box’.

Many major decisions are about changing what you are doing now. (Decisions like deciding what car to buy or vacation to take are simply research problems. They deserve your time.)

The real tough ones are like changing your job, moving to a new location, ending a relationship, etc. So, just picture yourself in a box with high walls on all sides, but open at the top. The box is, of course, your current situation. Now figure out all the ‘costs’ of getting out of the box. And there are always ‘costs,’ like having to give up friends, or job security, or the good things about your current location. Take your time thinking of the costs, and get them all in your mind. Make a list if there are too many to focus on at one time.

Then imagine yourself out of the box. What will it feel like? What will you be doing? No ‘rose-colored glasses’, just a realistic assessment.

Now compare the costs and what it’s like being out of the box. When you are honest with yourself, there is often a clear winner.

If the winner is change, then make the change. But just as important is if the winner is no change. Then stop thinking about it. You have examined the choices and are making the right decision. Of course, later new facts may arise and create a different equation. Then you can do the process again.

Try it. See if it helps you make decisions and keep the process from making you unhappy.